OSU visit

I fell asleep thinking of a short story.

It was a brisk autumn morning. Everything about the scene looked typical. The trees flaunted their red, orange, and yellow leaves. The sky was a misleading blue with a hot sun beaming down. The feel was familiar. Yet it felt different. Today was different. Today embarks a change.

Joel decided it was time to move on. He can’t possibly spend eternity dwelling on his past romance. She moved on. She threw the ring in his face. She said hateful words and did spiteful things. She hurt him. She tore him down. She shattered his hopes, dreams, and confidence. 6 months, 8 days, and 13 hours was enough time to self pity. Today embarks a change.

It was 3 o’clock when Joel stepped into the coffee shop. 3:05 when he ordered his coffee, sat down, and noticed her. She was alone. Her nose was buried deep in a book. It appears that she has been sitting there for awhile. Her coffee hasn’t been touched. Joel wanted to say “hello” but did not want to intrude. He walked to her table and sat down. She barely noticed him. After a minutes passing she finally looked up. Her long dark hair and olive skin were complimented by deep brown eyes. She was undoubtedly gorgeous. Better yet, she looked nothing like Amelia, the one that broke him. The ex one. The one that needed to be forgotten. Today embarks a change.

More to come when I get my thoughts together again…

Any Suggestions?

I need some tips/suggestions for veterinary school. Anything from how to get in, how to “wow” them in the interview, what I should be doing the year before applying, which schools to apply to, etc… is appreciated!

Right now my top 4 picks are

1. Ohio State

2. Michigan State

3. Univ of Florida

4. Cornell

November 20, 2014

I see a lot of interesting and difficult things in veterinary medicine. As expected. Euthanasias are becoming easier. It still bothers me; however, it is much easier for me to not think about it. Tuesday I almost had to cut off a dogs’ head to get him checked for rabies. The owner declined though. As weird as it is, I was thinking about that over the weekend. So to have that come up a few days later was strange. But now I know that veterinarians do it and not some public health worker. This morning I got to the clinic to learn about a horse euthanasia that was coming in. Additionally, one of the horse vets did a euthanasia on a cow. Out of her area of expertise, of course, but the client was a horse client so she helped him out.

Last week I watched a screech owl enucleation and shoulder repair. Today, sadly, he had to be euthanized. He ripped a hole in his shoulder and the bone (not the repaired part) was sticking out. It’s safe to say it was probably his time to go. Also today, I watched a tumor removal on a hamster. That looked stressful and I could tell the veterinarian was super stressed about it. Non-the-less he proved to be successful even with unexpected complications. The last surgery I watched was a tail amputation. That was interesting to me and everyone else. These people have even seen it before!

I really like veterinary medicine. It sparks my interest more than human medicine (which I was crazy interested in by the way). This was a very choppy post but oh well.

All Good Things Must Come to an End.

Whenever things start going well for me, something bad always has to happen. The balance needs to remain stable. I guess it was time for my balance to be put back to how it was.

I got into my program to get a second degree. I was told “yes” when I asked to shadow to veterinarians. I got the opportunity of a lifetime at Sharon Center. I’ve been given the chance to really help out in the office.

Just to have no money to pay for the classes I need. I can’t go to school. All my attempts at getting ahead, of course, were futile. I’m trying to tell myself that this is a good thing. Now I don’t have to stress over keeping a perfect GPA. I won’t have to be stressed in vet school. I can use my degree. It’s no big deal.

I just feel crushed. I don’t know why I thought this would ever work out for me. I’m stupid. Dreams are stupid. I’m worthless. Always have been always will be. Guess it’s time to schedule an interview for some meaningless retail job. That’s all I’ll ever amount to anyway.

Riddle Me This.

I got into a graduate program that started in May (summer term). I worked hard to graduate a year early and worked harder to get into my program a semester earlier. After completion of my first class my “professor” had the nerve to tell me that I didn’t do the assigned homework all class. I defended myself and offered to show her my notes and book. She was mad because I didn’t participate in class. However, I did not feel the need to sit there for 3 hours and talk about the chapters I read the night before. It was an utter and complete waste of time. We could have been doing more constructive things with that time like we did in another class.

All was good after that and Fall semester began. The entire program was unorganized. No one had any idea what was going on and we were expected to be in our field placements by the second week of school. Well that changed to the middle of September, which would put us way behind on hours. I made a formal complaint with the director of graduate affairs for the college of EHHS. Weeks passed and nothing changed. The “professors” (except one) did not seem organized, competent, or professional. They started becoming rude and bullying myself and a couple of my classmates. They were saying we wouldn’t succeed because we were quiet in class. However, all of us were doing a phenomenal job in our field placements. I can say this with confidence because my mentor thanked me for my work and said some other kind words. Also, my supervisor said she saw no reason for concern and would like to observe me again before midterm.

Unfortunately, I never made it to midterm (which would have been this week, Nov 10-14). My “professor” wrote me a two page letter degrading me. I let my group member read it because the “professor” said I was the weak link in the group and that they carried me during the presentation. I wanted a group members input. She disagreed and got very angry halfway through the letter. She was just as upset as I was. After that, another “professor” (one I haven’t liked from the beginning) graded me based off her assumption of me as a person rather than the work I put forth. She told me that my undergraduate work was useless (I did great in my undergrad career), my writing was terrible (my writing professors say otherwise), and that I didn’t have confidence (I do). I was done after that.

So I made another complaint. This time, the lady was not so helpful. She basically told me my concerns were for nothing and that I need to address the situation with my professors. Well, since they are the ones I was complaining about because of their unprofessionalism, I don’t see how that was really going to solve my problem. This lead me with withdraw from the program.

Now I’m working toward getting into my dream career. Wish me luck!

“There’s no hope”

In August of last year my oldest cat, Toots, quit eating and drinking. She became very ill very fast. I scheduled an appointment at my trusted veterinary clinic, Buckeye. I had to have Matt take her in because I was working. This new doctor, Dr. Banta cared for Toots. Or shall I say “cared”. He more or less gave my cat a death sentence. He said she was very ill and the likelihood of her coming out on the other end was slim. I, of course, opted to get a second opinion.

I went to Akron Referral in Copley. I met Dr. Boyce and he was relieved when he saw my cat. She was sitting on the window sill looking at the birds outside. Apparently, Dr. Banta told him what he told me. He more or less made it sound like my cat was on her death bed. Dr. Boyce told me that the fact she is active makes him feel better about the outcome. He took her from me to do an ultrasound and said he would call later with the results. A few hours passes and I get a call. He said that she seems to be okay, she has some jaundice but that’s from not eating. He prescribed her an appetite stimulant and said I could get her whenever.

A couple days later, my cat returned back to her normal self. The stimulant worked wonders. A vet tech at Buckeye called me, with cockiness in her voice, asking how Toots was doing. I told her that she’s back to normal and all she needed was a stimulant to get her eating. This made her unhappy and she abruptly got off the phone with me. I mean, I did just have them lose hundreds in euthanasia bills, so of course they were mad.

A couple months later, Matt and I took in this kitten. Against my better judgment I went back to Buckeye in hopes that I would be working with Dr. Cummings again. Nope. Dr. Banta seen me. He told me my cat was fine blah blah. Well she wasn’t. Her ear was bothering her. I took her back in TWICE with complaints of ear problems. Hard crusty gunk even flew out of her ear in front of him and he more or less brushed it off. Well that was the last straw. Matt suggested I take her to our dog’s vet, Dr. Arends, for a second opinion. So I did.

Dr. Arends found something wrong with her ear. She had an infection. He also did not trust Dr. Banta enough that he redid all the blood work to make sure Pichu, my kitten, did not have leukemia, HIV, or any other diseases. She was in the clear!

I want to tell Buckeye. But I don’t know how to approach the situation. Also, it’s been over a year anyway so do I bother? I obviously don’t want anyone else to lose their pet because of a wrong diagnosis.

Some people should not work in a medical field of any sort.

Don’t Let the Fear of Striking Out…

Today, while assisting a dental, I was talking to one of my favorite vet techs, Debby. She’s been in the veterinary field for a very long time and she is more than happy to teach me new things. She always tells me to come check something out on an animal or xray. After Sean euthanized a dog in front of me, she told me to feel it’s abdomen and tell her what I thought it was. She showed me where to feel and how hard to press. Then she showed me the x-ray. The dog looked like it was pregnant but it’s lower belly was rock hard. It was a splenic tumor with bladder stones. She also shows me bad teeth in the animals and how to take them out. She also volunteered to do my animal’s dentals because she loves it.

We began talking about Dr. Arends because I told her how I had to take Brynn there this morning to be sedated. I came in later than usual so I was picked on for it, of course. Debby used to work with him on the weekends when he was still a vet tech himself so she was telling me some stories. Then she told me that she was asked why she never went to “doctor school” like Dane. I told her how I could not wait to be in “doctor school” and that in my second semester of nursing I made the decision I was going to become a M.D. I mean, I was learning everything pre-med students were learning anyway so why not take that next step?

She told me that “being a doctor for animals is better. You don’t have to worry about bringing home as many pathogens; you don’t have to deal with people the same way. It’s nicer and you will enjoy it more.” She understood my reasoning for a dramatic career choice change without me saying a word about it.

I guess my decision isn’t really that dramatic. Sure, throwing away my graduate program because my heart wasn’t in it may have been “risky” but I’ve wanted to be a veterinarian since I was a child. I just let my grandmother tell me what I should do with my life. I let the fear of the unknown hold me back. I didn’t want to move away for vet school. But now, I have nothing holding me back. I’m more than happy to get out of this rinky dink town and explore new places. I’m excited to start a rigorous program. I do significantly better with 7 classes than I do 1 class, no matter the intensity level. I need to keep busy and be constantly challenged. After all, I did get all A’s with 20 credit hours and a job. 😉

I’ve always had someone tell me I couldn’t do something I wanted to do. I didn’t have confidence in myself. I didn’t have a backbone. I wouldn’t stand up to anyone. But those days are long gone. I’m doing what I want to do. I deserve to be happy. I deserve to enjoy my career and my classes. I shouldn’t dread going to work. No one should.

Matt supports my decision. He even said that WE could move to Columbus if I chose to go to OSU. He said we can make a trip to Ithaca, NY to check out their vet school/program. He’s mentioned moving to Michigan if I chose to go to the University of Michigan. North Carolina is another option for me. It’s refreshing to know that I’m with someone that believes in me, supports me, and wants this for me. Matt sees how hard I’m working toward my dream and reminds me everyday that if I put in half the effort while in vet school as I am making sure I have my bases covered to get into it, that I will do extraordinarily well.